(Trust me, start with part one)
Let us continue, keeping the previous two posts in mind as we go. Although this time, we shall be using a more "down to earth" tale - that is, not one out of the bible and a work of fiction, although surely one which is played out far too frequently in our world.
**NOTE**
While this portion is compromised of a fictional work, I have known several (more than a couple) of people over the years whose lives (including my own, in places) would closely parallel it in many ways, if not almost completely. This is not based upon any of their individual lives or specific circumstances. That said, let us continue.
Like yourself, your cousin AJ is also Christian and has always been passionate about their faith; a faith that you both give credit too for saving their life - a life that saw much pain and addiction in earlier years. It is this past which sets the stage for the next period in AJ's life.
As is the case from time to time, life happens, and it does happen in an absolute flood of unpleasantness for AJ. Two close deaths in the family, a job loss and some real issues with their children have pushed AJ almost to the breaking point. Nothing seems to be going right anymore - their very world seems to be getting ripped apart on them and they find themselves feeling quite alone and alienated from everyone including their church family.
In comes Joe. Joe is a close friend of AJ's although Joe is not a believer at all and lives a life somewhat like the one that AJ left behind in their past. And in this time of misery, Joe makes sure they are there for AJ as often as possible. Which, in theory, is a good thing but Joe has a different way of dealing with life than what AJ has become accustomed too. Joe's prefered method involves large amounts of alcohol, drugs and sexual contact. And, seeing the pain their friend is in, Joe moves into action. They arrange to have AJ over for the night - the same night that some friends are coming over to party - and Joe makes sure a young, single friend is among the group.
As the evening progresses, the seemingly inevitable happens. AJ ends up getting drunk and stoned and Joe's young friend successfully seduces them. Overcome by grief from not only their current life situation but also falling into their old life, AJ is driven far into the other direction and away from not only other friends and family, but away from God as well.
So here is the question: who's fault is it? AJ's falling away and into old habits (and some new ones) - who is too blame? After all, AJ is a friend, family member and a fellow believer so we want to blame someone, do we not.
Is it the one who seduced them? How about the other party guests? How about Joe? What about you? We cannot forget to include the devil as a suspect either, can we?
Depending on who you are - where you have been, what you have seen and who you have known - you have your thoughts on this. However, before you come to a concrete conclusion, perhaps some more information may be helpful.
Joe. Joe has known AJ for some time and they are pretty close for the most part. While Joe does not hassle AJ about their beliefs, they do not share them at all. Oh, he has prayed a time or two in times of crisis but really, they have no use for any kind of religion. For the most part, they feel strongly that those who profess belief are merely obeying a set of rules that have been forced upon them by the church and that their "faith" is no deeper a belief than that of it might be sunny tomorrow. In addition, Joe's own life has been filled with no shortage of pain and misery and the way that they have learned to deal with it is by "numbing it" through more "carnal methods". They still have their pain, but they manage to get it blocked out for a while with each drink or encounter. Joe has no frame of reference for what true faith is or how deep it actually goes, anymore than they know how devastated AJ's old life left them. Joe really thought they were doing a good thing.
The mystery seducer. They did not know AJ before nor did they really know anything about them except that Joe said they really needed to let go and relieve some stress. They themselves, are not a believer and have amount the same mindset as Joe with regards to all things God. They were not in a relationship nor have they ever felt that they had a "problem" with their drug or alcohol use, even though it has caused them problems before. The other part guests are in the same area as they are. They are who they are and they do what they do. None of them intentionally were out to "bring AJ down" in any way, shape or form. They all just wanted to have a "good time".
You. After all, it is you who is looking for someone to lay blame on, is it not? Why is that, and did you yourself play a role in this scenario other than that of the "helpless bystander"? We will come back to "you" a bit later, but for now, do not go assuming you are too blame quite yet.
AJ. AJ had a rough life before coming to faith in Christ. Even after, they had long periods of fighting against their old ways of life with limited success - a way of life very similiar to Joe's current life actually. While they had been moving forward, there always seemed to be something holding them back - some old influence that just held on. You see, AJ had not actually ever dealt with their past, they merely buried it down deep inside - "out of sight, out of mind" as it were - which means they never actually ever gave any of it over to God at all. This also meant that the "old AJ" still held power over them and a lot of it. When grief lowered their defences, it was not hard for the old to retake control.
The devil. While active in the world and an enemy of the Church, he is not omnipresent like God - he is a finite, single, created being. He also does not have to lure believers away for the most part. Our own old sinful natures are more than willing to give in to temptation and temptation is everywhere around us on a pretty regular basis. So blaming him for all our fallings and failings is hardly accurate.
Now remember, AJ "is" a child of God. The same God who choose to refer to AJ as His child. The same God who loves and disciplines His children. The same God who works out life's path and circumstances for the "good" of those who are His. God "is" love, after all...isn't He?
***To Be Continued***
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