Why The "Panicking Christian"?

Like most Christians, I occasionally find myself in a borderline, all out panic about something which I already knew, but seem to have forgotten or that I only knew in my head, as opposed to my heart. And mercifully, God decides to show me what is really going on or what it is that I needed to know, before I completely lose my mind.

So the writing within is just that. It is that which God has shown and taught me while I was typically in one of those times in my life. Since the way in which He has chosen to reveal things to me tend to be fairly easy to follow and understand, I am sharing them via this format. That said, I take no glory for any of this. It is God whom has given me the ability to write, and it is He who has given me the content to write as well and He who saved me by His glorious grace in the first place.

Thursday, January 23, 2014

These Boots were made for Walking


It is one thing for us, as individuals, to say that we trust God with everything in our lives.  Actually, it is a pretty massive thing truth be told and, for the most part, many (if not all) of us do not truly realize just how far reaching that is until God brings each thing in front of our faces.  And, if you are like me, you probably are a bit more resistant to some things than others.  We may trust Him with some things, but have a much harder time with even the idea of others.  For me, one of the big ones was relationships.  Trusting God with the relationships in my life sounded great, but really, I kept a pretty firm grip on things.  In case you are curious, the results tended to be less than wonderful, which is why I now try to trust Him even with the relationships in my life.  I tend to make a pretty big mess of things as a rule, while He on the other hand, well let’s just say things work out a whole lot better.  And it is actually relationships that are part of the focus today.

Once upon a time, I ran.  I do not mean I ran a marathon nor do I mean I ran from something “mad and hairy” intent upon seeing if I was crunchy or tasted good with ketchup.  No, I ran from God.  I had gone through a rough spot in my life and my faith was already less than stable.  I had stopped pursuing God and thus, kind of left myself wide open.  I was just kind of surviving, for lack of a better way to put it.

So in that time and place, I had started to drift, then wander, then into a full out sprint in the opposite direction.  I embraced ways of living that I had not done so before.  I went back to some old behaviors, habits and attitudes.  And those that God has been telling me to walk away from, yeah, those I jumped into with both feet.  I was running from Him.  Yet somehow, even during that time of insanity, I always still knew Him.  I cannot even give a reason for that because I surely should not have, but I did even if I was trying to outrun Him (in case you wonder how it works to try and outrun God, check out Jonah).

This went on for quite some time, my running away.  Until one day, out of literally nowhere, He came and called me back.  The only thing I can tell you is that I was in a place where all of those habits and vices seemed useless, hollow and empty.  As you may guess, I was pretty devastated when I realized what I had done and where I had gone – the guilt was horrifying to be honest – until He started explaining some things to me.

"My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand."  John 10: 27-29

Do me a favor:  make a fist, as though you were grasping something precious in your fist.  Now tell me, how far exactly can it get from you?  Arms length.  Arms length is as far as it can get away from you and arms length is as far away as I got from God.  It seemed like a million miles, but to Him, it was just arms length.

The hollowness I came to know with many of those old vices also spoke volumes.  In Ecclesiastes the teacher exclaims that “everything is meaningless” and that’s true.  All those old things made promises they could not keep – they were empty and hollow in the end.  As “good” as many may have felt in the moment, in the end, they just left me feeling empty.

So what does this have to do with relationships?  Well, the relationship with God could be an obvious tie in, but that is not the one I am focusing on today.

We ALL walk our own walk; we all live our own life.  No one could have walked where I have walked except for me and I would not have learned what I learned apart from that walk and those experiences.  Knowing that is one reason why, when faced with a rough change, I frequently pray that I learn whatever I need to learn and change however I need to change quickly, rather than praying for it to end.  Not the easiest thing to pray for oneself.  It is massively hard to pray for someone you care about who has hit a rough spot and is running from God.  But honestly, that is probably the best prayer you can offer, otherwise, if things end too quickly or they do not learn/change, then they will have to go through something probably even worse later on since they already got through round one without getting the point.

It is easier for us to surrender ourselves to God and His will than it is for us to surrender our loved ones to Him but it is the best we can possibly do.  After all, we cannot truly change ourselves, how can we ever think we can change another.

So if someone you know is running from God, it may be hard to do, but take a bit of heart – they need to walk their walk just as you need to walk yours.  Be there for them, love them for who they are not what they do or don’t do and pray that they learn <whatever> quickly, for mercy for them and pray they come back to God, but try not to pray that it ends before He is done.  And if it is you that is running:  take heart, He is not as far as you think - just stop running and come home.

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