As this is (obviously) part five (5), if you are new, I would encourage you to to go the links on the right side of the page and click open "April 2014" and start with part one (1) so things all make sense (well, potentially anyway).
Right about now, there may well be some who are asking the question: how could a loving God make, or allow, AJ to go through the ordeal they have gone through? No doubt we have heard variations of that before with other situations. One of the big problems with that question though is with regards to that all critical word "love".
There is an online comic that I check out now and then (adam4d.com) and not long ago, the artist said something that struck a chord and actually ties in to our story. He said that "God is love" but that "love is NOT God". Now one would think that God is love and love is God would be the same thing, but in truth, it really isn't.
The Bible says "God is love" (1 John 4:8). This is God's definition of love we are talking about - a divine, perfect, just, selfless love - think of the definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13 and that those are not only attributes of love but of God. What love truly is, is defined by the very character of God.
Now if we say "love is God", there are a couple of problems with that. One, only God is God - saying anything else is God sets one up for an unpleasant road of discovering what idolatry means. The other problem though, is that by saying "love is God", we use our own perverse, imperfect view of what love is (which is almost as individually unique as a finger print) almost as a scale to say how loving God is or is not. Since our view/belief of love varies and tends to not be perfect, then we view God as imperfect as well. God is not defined by our version of what love is.
Now, you may follow that fine and good but are still wondering about all that not only AJ has had to endure, but their cousin as well - for watching someone close go through such a thing is a devastation all its' own. I am not going to even pretend to understand with any sense of fullness the way that God thinks, plans and works things out - that is far beyond my mental capacity. I do, however, understand some more "worldly concepts" that do help.
Your child constantly procrastinates with homework and school projects until you step in and save them at the last minute. It has gotten so bad that you now wonder what kind of grade you have gotten each term instead of them. It is getting worse and it is starting to show itself in all areas of their life. Not only that, they now expect it and get quite irrate when "you" are taking too long to finish "their" projects. Enough is enough. You are the parent here after all.
They have a big project due, worth a large portion of their final grade, and they have known about it for almost two months now. The project itself is due at the end of the week and you stated last week that you were not going to do it for them - they had to do this one on their own. Needless to say, they have made their disapproval well known to the point of being sent to their room quite a few times for their outbursts. Time ticks closer to the due date and they have yet to lift a finger. While you are tempted to bail them out, you know doing so will hurt them in the long run, so you stand your ground.
Eventually, due date comes and, to your childs' dismay, there is no project to turn in from you and they did not even try to do it. They know how much this is worth and could cost them moving into the next grade. They flip. They blame everyone from the teachers to friends and most definitely you. Eventually though, they do calm down and decide to go for it. It is a quick attempt to finish a "better late than never" project but they are making a real effort. You help a little here and there but let them do what they have to do for the most part.
Now then, is the above parent acting loving or unloving? If they let them continue to procrastinate and feel entitled, would that not be unloving especially since they are the parent a know what unpleasantness awaits if it does not end soon. Now then, what if the parent in this is the "perfect parent" and they know every internal thought, dream, desire and fear of their child and know exactly what it would take to correct that behavior and thought pattern - would they not be unloving if they choose to not do what had to be done, and instead, ignored the problem? That would actually be a pretty hateful thing wouldn't it.
In the previous post, we learned a bit more about AJ and those things which plagued them for so long and even a glimpse of the damage it was causing them. While we may want to think that we could have thought of a better way to do things, we do have to admit that God "probably" knows AJs internal workings far better than even AJ, let alone someone outside of them. We cannot forget the saved love one either now can we. So maybe a loving God would have done, or allowed, exactly what He did after all.
***To Be Continued***
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