Questioning, doubting and unbelief.
Three words that none of us want to admit to having experienced but, in all honesty, we likely all can relate and recall more than one or two moments when each of those existed in our own lives. However, while many may choose to use those terms interchangably, they are not the same thing at all.
For instance, have you ever prayed about your unbelief? If you have - or you find youself there now - I want to share a story told to me by an old friend.
A family member of theirs was struggling with, what they believed, to be unbelief. They found themselves alone one day and began to pray desperately about it when the question was put to them: "If you do not believe, then who are you talking to?". Needless to say, it ended and answered their prayer pretty quickly. The point is obviously they believed so it was not a matter of unbelief to begin with.
Questioning, whether about something Biblical, some matter of faith or understanding, calling or whatever. Let's be honest, we have all done this one. So is questioning the same as unbelief or doubting? Not even close.
If you are questioning, then you are still very much interested in finding the truth. You are digging, seeking, reading, praying, thinking, talking, etc, etc as you attempt to find the solid answer you need. It does not matter if everyone else you know is not questioning, they are not you. And should you find yourself questioning <whatever> do not allow yourself to start thinking that God is mad at you for doing so. After all, Moses argued with Him about God having chosen the wrong guy, and Gideon put Him to the test (wet/dry fleece/floor) not once, but twice in a row. God would rather we question and find the truth than settle on being half heartedly sure.
Now doubts are a different thing altogether. To have doubts does mean you believe but it also means you are not questioning. Doubts are more like massive walls placed in the road in front of us that we cannot go around, get over or dig under - they just stop us dead in our tracks which is at least one reason why the enemy likes to use them against us as often as they do, although we are more than capable of putting them on ourselves as well.
Frequently, doubts are aimed at something which God has said, whether to us, about us or about Himself. Consider the words of the serpent to Eve: "did God really say...". Now if she were questioning that, she would have asked Adam and possibly double checked with God "What was it You said about that tree again and what would happen? And what does that actually mean?", but that is not what happened. Instead, she went with the doubt and the rest is history.
Considering how ineffectual doubts can make us, they are one good reason to get a good idea about who God actually is (not necessarily who someone else says He is or who we want Him to be), who we are, and who we are to each to other from each point of view. That does not mean doubts will never appear on the road before us, but it may mean they are not near as effective at keeping us stopped.
Should you find yourself facing doubt(s), there are a couple of things you can do to get moving again. One, ask God to help you with your doubt. Trust me, He knows you are having them so you are not going to shock Him when you tell Him and He has no problem helping one of His own get past a doubt. Another thing you can do is chose to change from doubt to question. Again, do not feel bad or ashamed or less somehow because you are questioning because in the end, all questioning is a search for the truth. Since God is Truth, then He does not mind you seeking at all. Better to question and seek than stay stuck in the mud feeling miserable.
Remember, these things are normal - it does not make you less of a Christian nor does it make God love you less just because you question or have doubts, and if you think you may be dealing with unbelief the mere fact that it concerns you probably means you believe.
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